Tough love

According to wikipedia, Tough love is an expression used when someone treats another person harshly or sternly with the intent to help them in the long run. In most uses, there must be some actual love or feeling of affection behind the harsh or stern treatment to be defined as tough love.

As the last child in my family, I have been subjected to quite a number of things that i thought were hurtful but actually went towards helping me have a backbone in this world. Nothing too serious though, like being blamed for things I didn’t do, being refused to go for slumber parties.

When I was younger, around 7-8 years old, i never used to eat much, or i’d refuse to eat completely (i know it’s not only me). My siblings were having none of that. Everyday they used to tease me and call me a skeleton and yes i was really hurt. What really got to me is when they said they would tell my classmates that i don’t eat coz i’m a skeleton. (i was an easily manipulatable child) Whoever came up with the saying “sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me”, please do some research. (Runs to google just because. results:here) I can even recall that i used to be left all alone at the dining table to finish my food, even till the middle of the night. No negotiation no matter how much i cried and whined. It was up to me. And i would rather finish my food than face the wrath of my mother. And unlucky for me i we had no pets to throw food to under the table. So i always finished my food. I am admittedly still the last one to finish my food. (runs and hides)  The point is that despite how I felt after how mean my siblings were, they got me to eat and finish my food. It’s discipline from tough love of course.

Then there are these times you feel like pulling out your hair. Some weeks back I had planned on going out with my friends from weeks back. The same day, my sister tells me that she wants us to go for a small concert-ish performance. I was like dang, my friends were depending on me to come through today. So i asked her what time we are leaving and she says 6p.m. At least it would work out. All i had to do was be home by 1730h. No issue. So one of my friends somes to pick me up at 1530h. I went and bid her adieu in quite a rush and told her i’d be back shortly.

As i put on my shoes she said that shes not going to wait for me and i replied saying that i’d be back soon. She said that she has suddenly decided to go on her own since I had plans. I just didn’t get it. why though? I could have my cake and eat it too but not on her watch. Of she goes to our mother and she tells her i have to make a choice coz both of those things have equal importance. The thing about me is that i hate flaking on plans that i’ve made mostly coz i’ve had more than my fair share of flaky snakes. So at the back of my mind i’m thinking, “Of course if i go and come back before she leaves i’ll manage to convince her to put our plans back on.” So i decided to go with my friends. Just as i’m about to leave along she comes, the whippersnapper and tells my friend to go and not wait for me.

So i go into my room to sulk just a little bit when i realise there’s no reason to dampen my own mood just to show i’m upset about something. And after all, it’s no big deal. Don’t sweat the small stuff; it’s all small stuff. wouldn’t want to get HBP.

To cut the story short, i discovered a couple of some pretty awesome local musicians, i met really cool people, some cute guys ♥_♥ and i think that day was kinda life changing. because I Started seeing things in different perspectives. I got home and i thanked my mother for making me go. talk about swallowing pride.

The same can apply to your friends. We all have that friend that you omit the truth from to spare their feelings. We all know that that isn’t helping them in the long run. Give it to them straight. some tough love is highly recommended. It might not be the truth they want but it’s the truth they need. whether it’s telling them their brow game is weak or letting them know that vertical stripes do not draw the eye up and  “make them look slim”. Give them your honest opinion if it comes from a good place. There’s no tough love without love, otherwise it would be just bullying or picking on someone. And when this “bully” tries anything, then stand up for yourself. Let them know they ain’t shit too since they shared their unwanted opinion. And if that fails, no worries. I got your back. Contact me here. I’m like Tyrion Lannister. I drink and I know things. That’s why they call me the drunken Assassin.

See what i did there.. please don’t make me explain. If you didn’t get that genius reference comment below.

This taught me that what you want isn’t always what you need. ahaha.. i sound like Mama Odie from The Princess and the frog. (breaks out into song and dance ♪♫♪)  Watch the movie if you haven’t. it’s gold.

02/17 chuck norris fishing trip

Till later, our beloved chuck norris is back with us from his fishing trip with a message.

Yours  intoxicateeeeeed,

Drunken Assassin